Loneliness: God’s Invitation to Solitude

"It is in solitude that we discover that being is more important than having and that we are worth more than the results of our efforts. In solitude we discover that our life is not a possession to be defended, but a gift to be shared." Henri Nouwen

He usually comes at night. I can sense him coming closer. He peers in the windows of my soul and tries to open the doors of my emotions. He has come again to break into my life and rob me of God’s joy and peace.

Suddenly he stands defiantly before me and laughs at my weakness. He moves in closer and I recognize his frightening face. He is loneliness - an unwelcome visitor permeating my heart.

Loneliness is a feeling of separation and grief. It is a sense of loss. It leads me to what seems like an unbridgeable canyon of isolation from God and others.

Loneliness lurks about when relationships are lost. He is there when circumstances spin out of control, when we are facing change, empty nests, and difficult trials. And strangely enough, sometimes in the aftermath of significant accomplishments, and even when we are surrounded by others.

After nearly six months of being away from my home, wife, friends and job, I have found loneliness scratching at my door. I am slowly learning something quite unexpected. I am never really alone. My Good Shepherd has gone before me and now walks each step of the journey with me. In fact, when I am alone I can see God and others more clearly.

Solitude is a remembrance of the presence of God.

Solitude develops a single-minded focus on God. This awareness creates an attitude of servanthood. Servanthood blows away the mists of loneliness and allows me to see the needs of others and the sufficiency of God.

The goal of solitude is not so much to unplug from my crazy world, as it is to change frequencies so that I can hear the Father. Lance Witt

God has been using the dramatic life and ministry of Elijah to instruct my heart. In 1 Kings 18, Elijah has just experienced God using him to defeat the prophets of Baal. Chapter 19 moves from the mountaintop miracles to the desert valley of loneliness and despair. The transformation of mindset and emotions is astonishing yet very true to my own battles with loneliness. God is now ready to use a time of solitude to heal Elijah’s loneliness.

Solitude is not the same as running away. Verse 19:1-3

Elijah is not running to God. He is running away from Jezebel. Elijah tells us he is all alone. In the valley he becomes isolated. On the mountaintop he stands with God. It is a choice of fear fueled by isolation, or calm strength of letting God be his champion.

When things seem too hard and patience grows thin. When the doctor’s report is disappointing and pain continues to attack. This is the time to seek solitude with God. The incredible thing is this can be practiced in my room, in the doctor’s office, or on the hospital bed.

"The wonderful thing about contemplative prayer is that it can be found everywhere, anywhere, anytime for anyone." Quaker Richard Foster

Solitude is affected by my physical and emotional health. Verses 5-7

Twice, the angel gives Elijah food and sleep. There is no lecture here or rebuke. My Creator knows exactly what I need and when I need it. God is preparing Elijah for a time of solitude to receive God’s revelation.

Sometimes, the most Holy thing we can do is receive nourishment and take a nap. Then I will be able hear God clearly and respond to His instructions. Although this is not easy for me, I must learn to peacefully rest in Him.

Solitude allows me to think deeply. Verses 9-14

Loneliness produces conversations dominated by me. By the time I am done talking to myself, I not only do not have God’s answer, but I can not even remember the question. Confused? Me too.

In solitude I learn to listen to God. One of the great blessings in this time of waiting for a transplant has been the freedom of meeting with God. He has given me the gift of many hours daily to pray, study His word, read, and meditate on the application of His truths. Solitude permits me to think deeply, instead of the mind-numbing exercise of watching TV all day.

Indeed, my mind instructs me in the night. I have set the LORD continually before me; because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Psalm 16:7-8

Solitude teaches me to pray confidently and live courageously.

Elijah learns in God’s school room about his purpose in God’s plan. He discovers that he never was alone. In verses 18-21, God reveals to Elijah that He has 7,000 more faithful servants and that He has already prepared his successor, Elisha. This time with God allows Elijah to move from a depressed “has-been” waiting to die under a tree, to a warrior who is more than a conqueror.

The next time loneliness comes prowling around, I will remind him that I have never, ever been alone, that God still has a purpose for my life, and one day God just may take me home on His chariot.

Alone with God,
Dan